In the past, it wasn't unusual for couples to stay married to the same person for their entire adult life. It was expected that you would only have one spouse unless death took them away. It was also presumed that couples would buy a home and remain in that community to raise their children. Commitment and community stability were two of the mainstays of the solid foundation that marriages were built upon.
In today's global economy, you're no longer expected to stay in the same community your entire life. You may travel the country or the world during your professional career instead. However, you can still have a committed marriage that grows stronger as the years pass. Unfortunately, though, it seems that people today are afraid of true commitment. Instead of entering a marriage with the intention of sticking around no matter what, many people go into marriage with the thought, "I can always get a divorce if things don't work out."
Having that idea, even if it's not a conscious thought, makes leaving one's spouse much easier when the going gets tough. But the road to a committed marriage with a rock-solid foundation is a journey based upon a simple road map. A couple must decide if they're willing to make the journey together, regardless of where the road may lead. Would you like that experience? Learn the six steps to building a strong relationship as you read on.
1Experiencing Romantic Love
Romantic love is the easiest form of love. It's nearly effortless. This love truly is blind.
Each person believes that the other is perfect and that their love can withstand any stresses that may come. This period generally lasts about two years. But it can change as early as six months.
2Making Some Adjustments
When you're just starting a new relationship, you have so much to talk about! You may find that you share many of the same hopes and dreams for the future. As the relationship grows, you want to be sure that you're building a rock-solid foundation on which to base your relationship. Having that solid foundation will help your relationship weather the storms of life and bring you joy together.
After the blinders come off, you'll begin to realize that your beloved isn't as perfect as you thought. There may also be a small hiccup in your relationship as adjustments are made. This is where the real relationship begins.
3Making Some Compromises
Sometimes, partners realize that they must adjust some of their dreams for reality. A power struggle usually ensues after this. At this point, one or both may decide to leave the relationship.
However, if they can stand together during this time, the relationship has a good chance of beating the odds. This is a time of learning to solve problems, negotiating to get what you want, and resolving conflicts. This is a crucial period.
4Re-Evaluation Of The Relationship
Next comes the point where each one re-evaluates their relationship. They turn to friends and family. They do this to get confirmation that they weren't foolish after all.
An affair is more likely now than at nearly any other point in a relationship. They must hold fast to their commitment. They have to re-learn who they are as individuals.
5Being Drawn Together Again
There is a point when a couple is drawn together again. They may still have conflicts and differences. But each one is more giving.
They may even be more forgiving when needed. They've weathered some storms. Hence, they are ready for the next stop.
6Acceptance Of Each Other
This is the end of the road to building a rock-solid foundation. They've learned to express their own needs while looking out for the needs of their partner. No one expects the other to meet their every need.
There is a balance of being individuals as well as a couple. They can now meet any storm head-on and can stand together with the foundation intact. From this point forward, their love and commitment only grow stronger.
On top of the foundation of love and commitment, there needs to be trust between both, conscious attention to your partner, and mutual respect. With these building blocks placed upon a solid foundation, your relationship will always be strong.
Remember this road map in your journey with your loved one. Build a rock-solid foundation. Enjoy true love for life.
Jackie Wing is an Alaska native, who enjoys snowboarding more than is probably socially acceptable. She lives in Anchorage with her two dogs Reese and Peanut, or as she likes to call them "Thing 1" and "Thing 2."